so tired tonight, but just not able to go to bed. one reason is that i need a shower, but i'm too tired and sore to get up and do it. i've been working on a deck. it's hard carpentry but kind of fun in its way. it's been sunny and part of my problem is a bit of sunburn.

the scrap wood comes from our old deck in the village, and was just brought out here where it's been kind of sitting around, in the way, for a while. finally i got started on it today, and ripped out a rotten part of the old one so that i could start in on the new one. then i sawed about eight boards and nailed about five in. altogether, maybe about an eighth of the deck.

it's really quite beautiful out in our front yard, and i have a good view of everything while i do it, but i was a little concerned about getting it right - measurements, nails, that kind of thing - and i didn't appreciate the beautiful day as much as i could. during this pandemic crisis, a lot of us are staying home a lot. time to develop these skills that one can only get by staying at home and working on them. my wife is working on her cooking and baking - an endless cycle, with lots of dishes - as we get used to basically not going out like we used to. a week at a time, in one place, with our single trip into town (see last post) full of getting everything we need.

i think there are tragedies the world over, that i'm trying to simply avoid. there are multiple deaths in all states, all cities - mostly friends of friends so far, no one i know well - but i think it's getting worse, not better, so i'm riveted to the news these days. who will it be next? elizabeth warren's brother, or, my sister's former colleague and his mother, or, the cousin of an old friend. like i said, it's mostly friends of friends so far. and the locals (our county still only has four, officially) who are related mostly to each other and not to anyone out of town - well they hardly know anyone.

but i think what they say about economic pain is more than real too. we here have enough money - we can go to the store, get groceries, come home, eat for a week. we are not in any danger of starvation or pestilence. we are vulnerable to the virus, so we're avoiding contact. but i was about ready to do that anyway, being sixty-six and all. but what i was going to say is that in a lot of these countries, being forced to stay home is the same as being forced to starve. with no money, and no ability to get out of the house and make some, people don't have much choice, no future, no food, no life. they can up and walk back to some village where presumably some relative has a garden. but even that is little comfort in this world. if there is no economy, then this huge underclass - which includes musicians, ubers, etc. even in this country - has no income. money runs out fast in this sector. countries can print a few trillion, and pass it around, but that will cause trouble too, eventually. it's a kind of mass chaos, but with mass starvation right around the corner.

and then there's still war. news comes today that the u s is still bombing people in spite of the coronavirus - so they have two pestilences, with us being one of them. do we have to bomb people? it was never really clear why we were doing it in the first place - these are for the most part undeclared wars - everyone knows we hate the islamic insurgents - but, i guess what that means is that someone is going to get hurt. coronavirus and bombing to smithereens.

thinking about my mom tonight - she was the one who told me never to drink bleach. that was when i was maybe two or three. that's all i'll say about the news. i think it's more complicated than that, drinking bleach, but i'm voting life this time, and staying away from it. off to take my shower. it's a fine spring evening, and we can finally leave a window open.