when you or any one of my children are in pain it is very difficult for me to go on in life as usual, write my stories, read a book, whatever. you have been with me all along, faithful, true, loving, taking care of us when we needed it. i will be here forever for you.

remember those of us who love you and how much we love you. you have lived through extreme pain. you can have all the good things in life. you remember, be true, take care of yourself, all of the best will come to you.

go outside every day. look at the sky. there was a time when you couldn't see it, when you wished you had it. now look at it. cloudy, rainy, hazy, blazing hot, doesn't matter. go for a walk. experience it. it is life. get exercise, take care of yourself, and live in the world. do it because you can and because you can love and be happy. if you can't get up, or exercise, maybe you're depressed...use that as your guide. when in doubt, go outside. walk a mile.

reach out, accept help from those who love you. maybe your version of the story is different from other people's; i'm sure that's disturbing. but people still love you. they will help you. they may never understand your pain. sometimes you will wonder, is anyone there? does anyone even notice? i'm here. i notice. others do too. reach out, and let them notice. talk about it. they can help you.

pray. things get better.

we love you. amen.